I'm Sorry, I Couldn't Come

Today will be the third weekend that I skip my routine visit to my parents place. I could hear myself telling weak excuse to my mum over the phone bout how busy I have been lately (yeah... so busy that I've been in the office since 10am and didn't do jack for the last 2 hours).

I don't know, I guess the fight left a bigger scar than I allow myself to admit. Everytime I remember about that night, when all the ugly words out in the open, tears just fall without me able to control it.

I love my parents, with all my heart. Will always be, no matter what lies between us. I know this act of 'isolating-them-from-my-life' is probably my way of showing them how unhappy I am for the act that they force me to do. And maybe when I can finally make peace with the whole things I can share laughters with them again.

Whatever happen, they're my parents, nothing can change that. Their blood run in my body. God knows I could never make myself leave them no matter how unhappy I am. I know. I tried. I could not do it.

Just for now, I think I need the time for myself. To make peace with myself. That, before I could try to have peace with everything else.